what a wonderful surprise...

This past week, I went to my moms and while looking through some old boxes of things I had saved, I came across a great surprise. It brought back so many wonderful memories and it also taught me a few things.....things that I already knew the importance of, but I was just reminded of it even more. Here is what I found...

My dad was such a wonderful man, but unfortunately his life ended earlier than I ever thought it would. For those of you who know me well, you know my father's life ended very tragically. I am not going to go into all of that, but there is one thing I know for sure, my daddy loved me so much and he always made me feel like the prettiest, most special girl in the whole world. I have heard that if children get this encouragement from their parents, they are less likely to look for acceptance and love in the wrong areas of life. So true...

After his death, I sort of forgot all of this and the good was out-shadowed by the bad. I am just being honest here.... I was very upset, angry, confused, and heart-broken. This really doesn't make much sense when I think about it though because as a nurse and through personal experiences, I know first hand how real chemical imbalances are and how these sicknesses are just like cancer or any other terminal illness. However, it was still the hardest thing I have ever had to deal with. This past week, when I found these letters, it was a reminder that I should definitely remember the good again when it comes to my dad. I began to think of his personality and all of the good moments we had. He was such a jokester and "cut up." This is just one example.... When I lived in the dorm as a freshmen in college, daddy sent me a lot of letters and often sent me a little money. One time, my letter was open and the money was taken. Here's what he wrote on the next letter he sent.... :)

Everyone loved him and half the time, he was so stupid, that he was funny. I also began to think about how much time he invested into my life. He always had a million questions for me after every day of school, after every trip I took without him, and of course a billion questions after every date! I remember him saying to me, as I reacted to his constant curiosity....
"At least I want to know all about your life. You'll understand one day." 
He was so right! As a concerned parent and one that wants to be a big part of my children's lives too, I now know exactly where he was coming from. Another thing is for sure....he loved Jesus and he constantly shared this with me and the importance of loving Him too. He shared this in almost every letter he wrote me and when I found the letters I had saved, I remembered that and it was almost like his way of telling me again how much he loved me and the importance of trusting God. My favorite part is where he writes.....stay close to Jesus. I will always save these. 

I am very blessed to have been born to Christian parents. I am also so blessed to have a God-fearing mom, who daily demonstrates a love for Christ and others. She is awesome and even before I can remember, my parents took me to church. I think I was only 13 days old when I first attended :)! Even though (like I said before), I have had a problem forgetting how my father's actions and sickness affected my life negatively, so many of his actions affected me in a positive way and helped me to become the person I am today. I know my dad is in heaven and I can't wait to see him again one day. Because of him, I am a better person, a stronger Christian, and a thankful, more attentive, parent. So here is the lesson of the day.....

• If you are a Christian, long to be a stronger one.
• If you are not a Christian, become one. Life is not worth living, if not with Christ. If you don't know how to become one, find someone who can help you or contact me and I will!
• If you have lost a parent, remember the good times.
• If you still have your parents, tell them how much you love them every chance you get. Be thankful for them and don't take them for granted. Mend the relationships that aren't great and make those that are great even greater. 
• If you are a parent, invest as much time as you can in to the lives of your children. It really does make a difference....no matter how young or old they are.
• If you are not a parent, remember this blog when you do become one (or even in your daily life when you interact with others).... write your children (or others!) letters, tell them how "pretty" and special they are, encourage them, and constantly remind them to "stay close to Jesus."

These are some of my favorite photos of Timmy and I with our precious children. My dad sure would have loved them. I am overjoyed and speechless when I think of them....they are miracles and God allowed me to be their mom! Wow.....really makes me forget all the silly things in life that we dwell on and worry over. I'm sure it does you too when you think about all God has blessed you with. God is so good.

Be still...

Every morning, the first thing I want is a diet coke and an unfrosted, strawberry pop-tart. Timmy brings me this just about every morning. It is just part of my morning routine...I wake up, I take a shower, I brush my teeth, yada yada yada, and I have a cold diet coke and a pop-tart. Weird I know, but that is me! The only time this wasn't my breakfast of choice was when I was pregnant. When I was expecting the twins, I couldn't stand the thought of a diet coke and around Christmas last year, when I woke up with absolutely no desire for a diet coke, I knew something was up:)! That was my first inkling that Mr. Pate was going to join our family in about 9 months! Hadden and Kamryn also have something they like to do every morning....why, I am not sure?? They want to take off their pj's and put on their shoes. I never thought anyone could love shoes more than Timmy, but I think his daughters just about have him beat!

Anyway, I was thinking just the other day how funny it is that we have routines that we follow and things that we do every day without even thinking about it. Sadly, the act of praying, reading our bible, or praising God isn't always on the top of that list. Of course, as Christians, we WANT these things to be high on our list of priorities, but somehow the things of this world always seem to get in the way. I know all of you can relate. Things that really don't matter in the big scheme of things usually take precedence over what is eternal. Timmy and I wanted to do something to help change this aspect of our morning routine. Yes, it will still include a diet coke and a pop-tart, but I want it to also include the desire to get on my knees and thank God for another day. While in Hobby Lobby the other day, I bought a wall decal for our bedroom just for this reason and Timmy and I put it up last night. Not only is it a beautiful addition to our decor:), but it also serves another purpose. Right over our heads, we now read, "Be still and know that I am God," Psalm 46:10. As soon as I woke up this morning, this is the first thing I saw in the mirror on the opposite wall. It almost felt as if I had tied a red string around my finger to remember something when I looked up and saw the printed letters on the wall, reminding me of the goodness of God. Mission accomplished!
Let's think about this verse more deeply for a second. Be still...what does that mean? In my life, I have almost forgotten what it feels like to be still and my girls have apparently never learned what it means either! Anyway........when I think of being still, I think of peace, quiet, and a sense of being completely assured that everything is going to be ok. I get flustered pretty easily, especially with change. Ask Timmy!  I find myself stopping all the time to remind myself, "it's all going to be ok...." Usually I am making a bigger deal out of something than it really is. This sort of reminds me of how I used to help myself to not freak out over big exams in college. If someone would invite me to eat, for example, when I should be studying, I would tell myself, "Alana, technically you have 12 hours to learn this stuff----if you HAD to." It wasn't a lie. I could have stayed up all night to learn my notes!:) Needless to say, I did have a lot of really late nights cramming for exams because I chose to do something more appealing first, but look....I turned out just fine and usually made a good grade! On the same note, the preacher said something the other day that stuck with me. He said, "the things we worry about, usually never happen anyway," and the more I thought about it, the more I realized how true that really is.

Let's move on and think about the end of the verse...know that I am God. Say it again in your head.....know that I am God, know that I am God, KNOW THAT I AM GOD. Wow! Our heavenly father is the God of all things. The God over our life is perfect. The God over our life has a plan for all things. The God over our life NEVER makes mistakes. Many times, we say this verse without truly giving it the credit it deserves. I have a feeling that this decal on my wall is going to be very good for me and my attitude every day....

I want to share one last thing with you who are reading this....something that helps me day to day. When I am overwhelmed, anxious, or fearful about something, I usually talk about it with my mom. She thinks like me and we are so much alike. Thus, her response is usually very encouraging and something that I need to hear. Timmy, on the other hand, just tells me like it is and makes me laugh in a moment of seriousness and/or sadness. I need that too though! His strengths definitely compliment my weaknesses very well, but that's another story for another day! After I talk to my mom, I always feel better. She just has a way of saying things. Her words are like band-aids on a "boo boo," as Kamryn and Hadden would say. One thing that she reminds me of very often is that when I feel I can't take one more step, I should just speak the name of Jesus. The devil can't stand to hear His name and his tricks and traps have NOTHING on Jesus and His power. Another thing I like to do is play Christian music constantly in my house. How can satan attack me with the name of Jesus being glorified over and over again through song....he can't! (These days, I listen to Elmo just as much, but hey, he seems to be pretty positive too!) I encourage you to try these things the next time you feel like you need a little boost. It really works. For some reason, as I just typed that last sentence, a song popped in my head. I love, love, love the Brooklyn Tabernacle Choir and because of this choir, I have a dream of leading a choir one day! When visiting New York a few years ago, we were able to go to church there and this is the song that the choir performed. Listen to the words and be encouraged. We can be still and know that our God is not just any God....He is the lifter of our heads, our glory, and our shield.